Let me be honest… I’ve made a lot of mistakes in my life. Even though I’m very young, I already have a lifetime of mistakes behind me, but it is important to recognize that, I also have a lifetime of successes behind me, often forged by these very mistakes. One is not the opposite of the other, but rather, the ingredient of the other.

Being Afraid Of My Emotions

The failure I made that immediately comes to mind is…

the fact that I was afraid of my emotions.

Mostly, I was afraid of my anger. Because my whole life I’ve been taught that anger is an unhealthy and undesirable emotion.

When in fact, it never was.

Anger is just another emotion, like joy, gratitude, sadness or anxiety. It is a good sign we can become angry if we face violence or injustice. Imagine being assaulted in the streets and thinking of just letting it go. How many times would you take the punch? Would you argue with your aggressor?

Sometimes, violence can only be met with violence, because sometimes, violence is self-defense.

It is how we express our emotions that matters.

To feel anger towards someone who made a sexist joke is good. It means you have the awareness around sexism necessary to recognize the injustice made towards women.

It is only when you decide to beat up the person making the joke that it becomes bad.

But anger can also be expressed differently. In peaceful marches, in poems, in music, in running, in tennis, …

Because what I’ve noticed is, someone afraid of their anger, will become the angriest person. Someone afraid of violence, will become the most violent person.